the unknown

We found out yesterday that one of Paul's friends is very sick with cancer and is being transferred into Hospice at some point today. It just makes me so sad and feeling like I have no idea what to do.
I've never met this friend and don't think it would be appropriate to meet him now. I'm sure he would like to spend time with his family and friends. I just wish I knew what to do - or if there was something I could do. Paul went to see him yesterday and said he wasn't sure what to say. I mean, what do you say to someone who knows he's dying in a few weeks? I know you want to make the best of the situation, but what do you say? I'm sure he just wants to be treated the same.

I feel at quite a loss for what to do. Paul asks me what I think and I don't think there's a right answer or the right words. I know he's upset and I just try to be there and listen, but what do I say? It just seems so strange that we're talking about this stuff at all. Shouldn't we not have to worry about these conversations until we're old?

This situation also sheds light on something that I constantly have to remind myself...live in the moment. I get so caught up with everything at work, that I forget to just live life. We need to start living and stop working. I feel like I'm sick of living to work, but rather working to live. I hope this awful tragedy helps me to gain some perspective.

So here, I'm writing it down. I am going to stop worrying about this meaningless stuff and start doing more fun things. I am going to show my family and friends that I love them. Because at the end of the day...that is what counts. Not this stupid work stuff, not the stupid arguments I get into, or the frustrating people that I encounter. But the people you love - that's what counts. I need to keep remembering that.

My vow here is to live life and not look back.